Performancing Metrics

Your browser (Internet Explorer 6) is out of date. It has known security flaws and may not display all features of this and other websites. Learn how to update your browser.

Jerk Free: 5 Things to Say to a Woman that Will Make Her Quiver

Romance isn’t assumption, and if you care, remind her. Women may be great at multitasking, but they suck at mind-reading.

Women claim that their husbands simply aren’t affectionate [enough], this according to author Deirdre Bair in her book, Calling It Quits: Late-Life Divorce and Starting Over “for one woman it happened when she asked her husband to help in the kitchen and he shouted angrily for her to keep her voice down so he could hear the television.”

1. You look beautiful

Genuine compliments cost nothing and when the recipient is deserving of one, she ought to be told. Women put effort into how they look, and if they’re going out, they’re doing it to feel beautiful, and for you to notice. Bitesizedonut, a reader on, tells us, “It is acknowledging the fact that, while we may be beautiful, we can still be MORE beautiful.”

Get this, according to the sage advice of Rodney Battles, a columnist for, if a women responds “with more than five words” specifically, ‘Thank you, it is kind of you to notice,’ she might be interested in a little more than just the compliment you’ve given her!” What do you think?

2. Yes

This one word holds the potential for creativity and freedom. Eckhart Tolle, author of The Power of Now, recommends saying “yes” instead of fighting or resisting, “yes has enormous power to create stillness,” recommends Tolle. The freedom of the word “yes” lies in its flexibility.

When combined with “I’d love to, but…” it releases you from sounding like a jerk for saying “no,” and avoids the recipient feeling rejected.

3. I appreciate you

“Most women I know enjoy being told, just prior, during, or after the commencing of nude olympics, that the man they’re with finds them attractive or at least non-repulsive in some way,” according to Dr. Ding for It’s the thought that counts, and when you make her feel wanted with unexpected surprises that don’t fall on birthdays, or anniversaries, you will be doing wonders for her and her self esteem.

4. My treat

In Jane Campion’s movie, Bright Star, Fanny Brawne’s mother advises her that John Keats is a poor suitor, “he has no money.” Mum’s concern is understood. Keats posthumous acclaim and true love notwithstanding, women like being treated and in today’s economy, unpublished poetry won’t even get you to first base. Respect her financial independence, but be a gentleman and pick up the tab.

5. I’ll do the dishes

According to the Journal of Family Issues, married men do less housework than those unmarried. Further findings show women’s perceived marital conflict when it comes to a division of household labor can influence thoughts of divorce.

If she does the cooking, it is only fair that you do the washing up. Besides, doing dishes is appreciated and can lead to foreplay, if she sees you care enough to relieve her of these chores. Many thanks to the lovely Vivian Badashian and Ingrid Haubert, two beautiful friends who suggested this one instead of “I’ll cook.” “Women actually prefer when guys do the dishes; sometimes, the view is a turn on,” Ingrid told me. Vivian agreed, nodding furiously.

  • I find it funny that men often complain about no sex from their wives. If they only pursued their wives and took these 5 hints, they may find themselves sexually satisfied :)

    Gena Morris

    5:50 pm

  • “Whenever you feel like criticizing any one…just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

    Daisy Buchanan

    3:19 pm

  • Jerk Free: 5 Things to Say to a Woman that Will Make Her Quiver @stefanpinto

    Tanya Fayed (@MissTFayed)

    8:12 pm

  • Wish more men would understand this. A small compliment can go a long way. Specially when they notice you’ve done your hair, or are wearing something nice. I know the hair thing is a bit of a cliché, but it’s because it’s true.


    6:52 pm

  • Stefan, I really really really like this! Did I say that I really like it?

    Rona E

    6:31 pm

  • Oooops! After I posted this, I realized it’s right next to “It’s Summer and You’re Still Fat…”! Ah well.

    Stefan Pinto

    6:20 pm

  • Leave a comment  




    Submit comment